a week

it's saturday. yay...

i've been enjoying my classes. really participating and focussing. in fact i think i might possibly be the loudest. so far i feel that i have a positive response from most lecturers. one or two may feel confused though at my exuberance. the rest of the class are very quiet and well... mature thinkers probably. i am obviously the psycho. haha. whatever. i'm enjoying myself.

i've had time to reflect during classes cause that's what they want us to do. reflect on ourselves as teachers and how we reacted, on what we have done. it's like opening doors to discussions on how to become effective-reflective teachers. too bad i'm running away after this course to the office. i hope i get either masters or an office job. yeah i can't teach no more. crap at it. i love studying. i'm very blessed to be studying with ezrin.

she complements me well. whenever i get blur...she just comes out and put me right. she's also very patient with my bullshit. i need friends like that. i've been so lucky. Alhamdulillah

i'm trying to get my head around phonetics. i failed during my b.ed in phonetics. it's the one thing i couldn't understand. but i'm trying to overcome that weakness now. i have weaknesses i'm trying to overcome. so many obstacles due to my own pride and ego that i need to dissolve. With Allah's grace, i hope i'll be able to. i really want to excel this time. to prove to myself that i'm not such a loser.

anxiety

i was anxious about the first day of lessons.
i am grateful that it went off well.
all the lecturers who went in did their job well.
richard teoh, mercy thomas and mohd mohathir jamaludin for
llu, dtc and lld..

i'm actually rather afraid of lld. it reminded me of my failing during b.ed years. i couldn't get my head around transciptions of phonetics. i'm horrible at it.

today we also got our library card and student card.

we're allowed to borrow 8 books for a week. but just now i borrowed 7 books and allowed for 2 weeks. hehehe
those books are:
1. the devil's dictionary of education- tyrrell burgess 371.102 bur
- a funny book poking fun at education

2. naked at work (and other fears) - paul hellman 158.72 HEL
- tips on staying sane

3. brilliant memory- tony buzan 153.12 BUZ
- memory tips and exercises

4. 100 essential lists for teachers-duncan grey 371.102 GRE
- tips

5. teaching and assessing skills in english as a second language- peter lucantoni
420.0075 LUC

6. the routledge dictionary of english language studies - michael pearce 428.007 pea

7. learning to teach- linda shalaway 371.102 sha

sleepy

yesterday i slept at 8.30 pm. i was so worn out. ezrin sent me home.
today she sent me home again. we had pizza hut at ou before that.
yesterday we got wind of a lecturer who's name is very unlike who she is. so the gossip goes. as ezrin has first hand experience, i believe her.
nevertheless, i'm trying my best not to let those things get to me. i'm already feeling overwhelmed and full of apprehension. i worry i might not be able to cope and excel. plus i need to buy a laptop. i don't have money for it. unfortunately.
i may need to borrow some to buy. haha
i seem to have fever and a little cold. couldn't breathe well so i need my vicks and such. i'll get back on it soon.

kspk first day

my first day at kspk.
i woke up a minute before half past five. haven't woken up that early since november 2008. hahaha. okay maybe once or twice.
got myself ready and my brother drove me to the kelana jaya lrt station on his way to shah alam. i was in line by 7.04 am. there was a long queue behind me. when the lrt arrived. i decided to just stand by the door. it was good that i did that. the next few stops before kerinchi had loads of people coming in and thus if i had been sitting down, i'd had to bulldoze my way out. not good at all.
not many people came out at kerinchi. i arrived at the station at 7.20 am. i walked briskly, feeling good about finally exercising some. there was only one other person going my way and she was at the time way in front of me. but i caught up with her while waiting to cross. i crossed, she waited a bit more. turns out, she's a student at ipba. i saw her at the canteen.
i met up with ezrin at her car outside the hostel and we went our way up the stairs to ipba/eltc. as it was only 7.40, we had our breakfast at the canteen. i had a bowl of porridge and plain water. cost me rm1. hahaha
at 8 thereabouts we went up the lift to the first floor on the eltc side of the building. cik norisham was there to meet us for registration. there was intially 11. but 2 dropped out cos one in sabah, another sarawak. another sarawakian man will be coming tomorrow. at first there were only 4 of us. me, ezrin, liew and aini.
the registration was from 8 to 10. to we waited to 9.00 before the rest started coming in. there were 8 by that time. all ladies, all married and registered except me n ezrin. aini from pahang, liew from johor. the rest around selangor/kl and putrajaya.
after a brief briefing, we went to the hostel. an apartment was got ready for us. in it were 5 rooms. a to e. ezrin and i chose room c. it was a 2 person room. we basically hang out just the two of us. the youngest is liew. 3 of us born 1979- including edayu, kelantanese teaching in gombak setia.
oldest is around 1965. not sure who though. it's a toss up between selva (lives in nilai) and kak hana (putrajaya). the sarawakian coming tomorrow, david is around that age too. 40+
at 10.30 am we went back to the class for more briefing. then were let off for lunch at 12.00. ezrin and i went to marco's pizza pasta and vino at bangsar village. i had tummy ache and wind after that. linguini carbonara. gaaah. it tasted wonderful but i guess i couldn't take it. hahaha
went back to hostel for prayers and at 2 at the class. pn farah the head admin came and spoke a little from 2-3. then we went to the library on the same floor for a little tour and registration of the library with mr rowland.
i was excited to see jean floyd's picture and even a picture of a few of our b.ed mpik lecturers. raja azizah came to speak to the class for a bit before too.
oh almost forgot. at around 2pm, nearer to 3, we were joined by a new classmate chen from ipoh. she had previously tried to register but her letter said for her to go to ipba. so she went. they finished at 1.30. wow
tomorrow another lady will join too, nurlida from shah alam. i wondered if it's actually bam of b.ed. hahaha
so far, i kinda feel like the possibility of me and ezrin not being chummy with the others is quite big. there's a kind of barrier i feel between them and us. it's the older teachers actually who seems to be raising that barrier. we hope we would be able to ignore it though. i want to be cemerlang this time. so no politics thank you.